The Invisible Bridge – My Leap of Faith at 65!

Jim and Pauline in Penang

Jim and Pauline in Penang

Checkpoint – are you heading into those silver years and feeling old and useless? Do you find yourselves in an unprecedented state of uncertainty, stress and nervous tension and the feeling time is running out? Maybe it’s just me but I find myself wanting to do more, not necessarily because I have to – although I must admit that if I had to live on my pension alone I would fall somewhere between “poverty” and “barely surviving.” In talking with family, friends and acquaintances in and/or around my age group, I am learning that my situation is not unusual. On the contrary; I find that a growing number of “baby boomers” are “in the same boat,” to put it in an overused phrase from my day.

Let me share my story and see if it resonates with you.  This month, May 23, I turn 65, and my own life, personally and professionally, has changed beyond recognition in the last year. This time last year, May 6, 2013, I had not yet set foot on Malaysian soil, yet now I live here – in a manner of speaking – and plan to transform the world from this base with my husband of just over one year.  Is it a wild dream or a realistic possibility? Am I experiencing the madness that many believe comes with old age?  How did that all happen so fast?

Allow me to answer that. It has long been my passion to transform the world; to partner with my soul mate and leave a legacy for those I leave behind when I ‘shuttle off this mortal coil.’  Decades ago I set these intentions, and trusted they would occur….yet I had no way knowing now how, where or when it would come to be.  During my life I have not always been so bold but my intentions were always authentic and always trusting.  Let me share my timeline right now.

I stepped out on to the invisible bridge  – you know … the one that ‘Indiana’ Jones stepped out onto toward the end of “The Last Crusade” – on May 21,  2012 with the certain knowledge that my “leap of faith” would plant my foot on the right path. Okay … so maybe I did not have that certain knowledge, but I felt confident enough in my intentions to take that chance. I had, after all, been setting and writing down my intentions for over 6 years without knowing the details which managed to remain largely unknown until about three years ago.

At that point my life was unfolding in an embryonic way which, at 62, was a wee bit unnerving.  During a time that would normally have someone thinking of retirement, a pension, a quiet life of being a grandparent and staying home with the grandkids, I was selling everything I considered dispensable (which turned out to be about 2/3rds of what I owned), letting go and moving headlong into a new relationship with someone who lived half-a-planet away from the only home I had known for my entire life. Not once did I really stop to consider what the consequences could be.

This journey’s outcome became more certain as time passed because I had based my choice and my intentions to share deep unconditional love with someone who shared my profound commitment to leaving the world a better place for “our” having been upon this earth. As much as that, I was drained from having done so much by myself, a feeling that “being on my own” tended to produce.

Oddly, I was not completely prepared for the speed at which this river could flow on its inexorable journey to the sea. And to this day I have no idea where it will eventually enter the ocean of all that is to be.  So now I hold fast to my courage, steer where and when I am needed, and watch as the powers of the universe chart the seas we must sail at this point in our lives.

The adventure comes with being unable to count on the next week being as I think it will be today or tomorrow. What I do know, however, is that it will be what I intended even if I fail to recognize it right away.  Have you experienced that sensation?

Do things like that scare me? Absolutely; more than I care to remember. Do I regret taking risks, setting new goals and taking a huge step into the unknown? No. 

Just as before, I know that I set my intentions and that they addressed good and decent goals. That knowledge enables me to feel truly alive and aware of the world around me.  Whether or not I like roller coasters (and in reality, I’m not overly fond of them) I am ready for the roller coaster waiting out there for me if it must be. Being the entrepreneurial creator of my life, my health, my wealth and my personal legacy is quite empowering even if a little frightening at times.  And so now with my companion, my soul mate – Jim, aged 70 – I have become far more intrepid that I thought I could be and believe me, I have done some things that Jim finds difficult to believe and more difficult, at times, to understand. We often discuss the possibility for more “baby boomers”  like us doing what we are doing. “Do they want to?” “Can we help them?” We hope so because we would like a growing number of intrepid “boomers” to join us on our adventure. There is more to the story, and in my next installment of the “Journey of a Lifetime – The Story of My Leap of Faith” I will tell you more. Jim and I feel that we are here to walk this path with you and others like you.

We would love to hear your thoughts. As some of our wisest men once said in song … “All you need is love!

Are we doing the right things? Or are we missing the obvious and merely doing things right?

DSCF0441Time for radical change – let’s begin 2013 by doing the right things!

As 2012 closes its portal on a strangely chaotic and yet transformational year, I reflect on what is happening both in my own life and in the bigger picture in the world. Everything from politics to social reform – and of course ‘the weather’ – has thrown curved balls at all we used to know; governments over turned, hurricane ‘sandy’ hitting New York, austerity and bankruptcy across Europe…The famously reported ‘end of the world as we know it’ on December 21st came and went and chaos reigns supreme. But there does feel like a new underlying energy is emerging and in places one might not expect.

We are at a tipping point I believe where things cannot continue the ‘same old same old’ way. I have in my own world transformed everything to be different; aged 63, I met and married my true love from another continent all within the year, I stopped working the way I was doing, I am looking at new ways to create income, have moved to new environment by the sea and choose with my new husband to risk all for a new future together. We are not throwing our past away, nor become defiant and revolutionary but more we see that the way most of us do things right because we believe that keeps us safe, in fact miss the opportunity to do the right things.

Within the chaos of last year’s events, governments and authorities, civil and social rules still appear to cling to ‘doing things right’…rules and regulations tighten their grip on world affairs (and our lives) and the minute details of our everyday existence suffers out of our control… bills get bigger, incomes smaller, law abiding citizens threatened with bankruptcy and poverty line-living, austerity extends its embrace, and still the rich get richer. “Tighten our belts” is the great chant of EU countries and others across the world, even the US, as ‘austerity’ lingers it stifles the desire for growth. We continue to impact people through rules that have outgrown their sell by date. Red tape, banks, taxes, liabilities, fines, all stunt those small businesses that are the lifeblood of many countries by applying unfit rules that governed last year’s budgets. Why don’t we question whether ‘doing things right’ is right?

titanicHow can we fit desirability for a better healthier wealthier life into ‘rules’ and into ‘doing things right’ if the right things are not being done? When rules are outmoded, who gets to transform them? Dare I ask – who gets to create new designs, guidelines, “rules” for a new order that embraces the ‘right things’ rather than stay “doing things right” as governments, politicians and rule makers tend to do merely because it’s the way we’ve always done things? A bit like the Titanic, built by doing things right to ensure an unsinkable boat, the designers didn’t do the right things to compete with an iceberg… the ship went down, the past is sunk. The world is being thrown curved balls wherever we look yet all we do is keep on doing things right and not noticing when it does not work.

Let’s deepen the point… take an example personal to me and mine.

I married my true love, Jim, this Oct 7th 2012; and being of mature years, he American and me British, with over 90 years of expertise between us, we have much to offer the world of work and the desire and the need to do so. Experts in the field of Entreprenology and Gender Communication, we deliver inspiration and information- rich programs that can add richness (in all ways) a new class of successful SMEs and budding entrepreneurs that the UK desire to kick-start our economy.

The first ‘doing the right things’ rule, that is a stumbling block rule for us right now, is that one can’t just fall in love, get married and turn up in the UK and develop business even though we desire to add to the UK coffers by paying lots of taxes, spreading employment and boosting the UK economy.

Given we are 63 and 68 respectably, (and the US and the UK are not as friendly about letting people into their lands just because they are married), we have not got a work visa yet for my husband and a deadline looms when we might have to fly away for a period of time before being let back in. Due to the rules, we might end up being forced to be apart for two months (which will be painful as we are very much in love) so we may have go to yet another destination and disturb our hopes of building a strong business in the UK. The worst scenario is that it could bankrupt us merely by stopping us doing what we do best.

Ever the optimist, “hope springs eternal” and we hope to gain the VISA permission soon (I will let you know as that occurs)… but it’s not easy because rules say what has been laid down and therefore must be followed … rather than doing the right things and looking at case by case scenarios.

It appears the fundamental principle behind this particular set of ‘doing things right’ immigration rules is that few countries heed a love story – it’s all about money and costs; i.e. can we be a ‘credit’ not a ‘cost’ by being UK or US residents?

This got us thinking about the ‘cost’ of old age and whether we (as society) are really doing the right thing when it comes to our expanding mature generation. Something Jim and I are acutely aware of… and paying attention to!

Why do we see only the cost burden of old age – rather than as an amazing pool of talent as a credit base for a revival economy?

In the course of our own investigations, we have discovered that if two mature over 60’s people such as us, 63 and 68, from different countries fall in love but didn’t have the inclination, skills or energy to develop a business or a lot of money, they wouldn’t be allowed to stay in either country to live together. Each country fears the burden of old age – because ‘old people cost money’… now although I can understand that care needs to be taken in the case of immigration in general and rising populations are costly, more and more oldies like us can contribute a lot.

Surely wisdom adds value?

In a world where we are growing an ever increasing mature world population of oldies, with more people over 60 and rising life expectancy especially for women, it would be a good idea to view over 60’s as potential credits to society i.e. see them as wise experts whose talents can boost a failing economy – both driving new business and lowering the drainage on medical care by staying motivated and healthy for longer – let’s not view all oldies as a disaster zone!

Millions of oldies like us do not feel or act old

There is much evidence that many oldies (for this example 60+) are choosing to be single again after long marriages, often seeking new energy from new love relationships (without the need to have babies), potentially parting company from spouses on friendly terms, and wanting to ‘give back’ to society, create businesses and building a meaningful ‘old age’ rather than giving up and waiting to die as a burden to society. Jim and I don’t want that. Having found each other, we may not have the energy of our teenage years, but as we jogged down to the sea today, the spring in our step was strong and our desire to improve society rather than rest on our laurels was a “10 out of ten”. How powerful is that if we harness over 60s rather than write them off?

By doing the right things many have been locked into ‘being old is a burden – viewing retirement, pensions and eventually being in care homes as the only course ahead. We disagree and in fact see our generation as a potential rich source of economic revival. However we need a new perspective on this not the old rules of business controls, restrictions and penalties – or the good intentions of many entrepreneurial oldies of 60+ could be shattered forever and we create an even greater burden of an unmotivated unhealthy old age.

photo (3)My husband, Jim, and I are not prepared to retire and lay down our gifts, we want to work for the good of our homelands – the UK or US economy – and do the right things not just for our own life together but for our children, their children and their children. We want not just to work but to be an advantage to a failing economy, not a cost but a credit note on the bottom line. And we know millions like us. We plan to educate and teach them the core practical Entreprenological Skills and mindset needed. Watch what happens when wisdom, imagination and experience take up the mantle once more and ‘economic heroes’ are 60 plus!!!

Footnote
Wisdom is doing the right things, not doing things right
Taking a lesson from ancient wisdom, Solomon chose the mother who would rather give away her baby than have her child cut in half when two mothers claimed the same baby. Solomon did the right thing by observing the personal emotion of the mother who cared.
Mature oldies have much to care about, yet governments and society often penalises, demoralises and restricts their contributions and ideas when ‘doing the right things’. Oldies like us have been around a long time, let’s do the right things and give credit to a life that is worthwhile, and create ways that people like us who are willing to contribute into the economy in new ways, can do so.
Let us know your views

What is a magical conversation?

What is a magical conversation? I have been asked this many times and it’s hard to say exactly although you surely know when a conversation has been miserable!

That is one that makes your blood drain away or boil.

It’s a conversation that isn’t actually a conversation as it is one sided, even when more than one person is talking.

It can be full of tears and/or fears, angry words or can just be downright boring. Have you ever sat in those and wondered why you are there?

You play your part.

Miserable conversations take place the whole time, at work and at home, in shops, on the streets, on the tubes, in pubs, in bars, in restaurants, across families, across nations, across continents. You observe the silent conversations where not a word is said as you sip your beer.

You are responsible.

The worst is still to come – the conversation that starts wars – the controversial conversation, the blind conversations, the bigoted conversation. The vitriolic conversations that create divorce, achromous settlement conversations; the legal battles conversations; the conversations without resolve; the embittered conversation; and the unspoken bereavement conversations.

You are able to transform.

“Magical conversations” came into my life from an early age and really ran through my life. There were many of these conversations around the breakfast table when I was a kid. As I grew up and realized my awkward teens and then found adulthood, I had the miserable ones too of course! Yet I always was attracted to magical ones and to creating them too. I didn’t necessarily call them that then. I received a delightful comment from my daughter, Gemma, some two years when she said “you know Mum, you should call yourself the president of magical conversations, as you make them wherever you go” Thank you to her.

I listened and took the comment on board. I felt President was a tad grand although I do preside over such events now. I started to say to people that I was the “Ambassador of Magical Conversations” and it attract both interest and intrigue and indeed started people switched on to what they said, the intent they used and the effect they had on others.

It takes a tuned in person to know when they have switched someone else on … or off! When we step into that magical conversation of inspired trust, respectful observation, openness and honesty, welcoming contributions from diverse minds, encompassing all views and listening with two ears and speaking in turn, we create a sacred space that holds no barriers to magical outcomes. My dear friend and colleague Richard had evolved a passion to hold ‘third space meetings’ in 2009 and create that sacred space for all to share. This fulfilled my nature of magical conversations because the space provided the final ingredient, the fertile ground for voices to be heard. Those attending always went out with a smile and an air of joy.

The events we hold now are helping in many senior corporate circles and in our own lives and can work anywhere.

Magical Conversations are magical because we know not what we might create at the start; we merely hold the intention for a third space between us, we state the topic in principle, state the guidelines and allow the seeds of the conversation to germinate and grow into collaborative results. This style of conversation can be used anywhere any time for amazing results, in the boardroom they can turn businesses around, in families they can change children’s future lives.

Magical conversations have three core requests from all participating …

• To enter with full intention to listen, to contribute, to share, to care, to observe, to speak and to invite a wide diversity of contributions to whatever the central subject or topic is being regarded.
• To park any egos outside the door, to bar judgments and opinions, yet share from experience, giving evidence and stories to help where required, allowing conjecture if given permission by the collective, and always keeping the space safe for all to be there.
• To leave the conversation knowing you have given truly, and received richly, have helped everyone feel inspired and lifted, enlightened and expanded the conversation.

Any conversation can be magical, a quick conversation at the bus stop; a long business conversation in the boardroom; an intimate conversation of friends; a romantic duo out on a first date.

A magical conversation flows, it winds, it laughs, it cries, it surprises and it confirms the unconditional love and acceptance of difference between all parties. This is a true loving communication between human beings, as we all have been given the gift to communicate, whether by voice or sign language, in English or any national dialect, inter-generationally or in peer group parties.

Where talking happens, conversations thrive. Magical Conversations never die.

“Wisdom starts with wonder” Socrates

Ever thought about where your wisdom comes from? What has been imprinted into your very being before you are born from generations before you? This is not in the sense of past lives (that’s for another blog…) but simply the wisdom of inheritance from 2-3 generations past, merged through male and female lines, and the communities around them, into your essential being as you occur in your day.

Our wisdom is so influenced by the nature of your family history and adjusted by the times they lived in and merged with the times you now inhabit. Our wisdom comes from both maternal and paternal pathways of course and whether these are actively known to us during our childhood or not, whether we are orphaned, adopted, fostered or brought up by our natural parents, in wise or unwise whys, the unconscious guidelines are there. How can we bring these alive into conversations today where we share the wisdom over generations, like a wisdom waterfall, seeking our elders, to talk with our mid-life ages, and our youth to really listen to the evolution of current day wisdom.

I was fortunate to be born into a wise tradition of love and family values, and my childhood was one of love and togetherness. I look around today as people talk about the breakdown in ‘family’ living and community cohesion, and I wonder how and why we, collectively, have lost what people most cherish, a rich and fulfilling life; a sense of belonging, a pride in contribution for its own sake. The wisdom of the word ‘rich’ has been misplaced by the obsession for money and not as a word to describe a desirable natural life of joy and happiness, rich in all aspects of life, relationships, love, identity, achievement and wholesome success. It feels somehow we have got the whole word trapped in a sticky web of materalism. Where does our sticky state come from? Is it inevitable because of our history or can we unstick the web of the past to emerge like a butterfly. I know we can all do so, and use the wisdom from ancient times to present day.

My own wisdom was influenced by my history and the times I was born into. It has also evolved through the route I have taken, the attitude I have developed and the good daily practices of living that guide my journey. I have evolved with my own children’s development; influenced by my choice to be of single status after 30 years in a partnership with their father; now as a grandmother and an entrepreneur, my wisdom evolves further as I seek to engage in a new way of collaborative living suitable to this era of transformation. Collecting strands of wisdom from all ages, all diverse individuals and multi-potential groups across society is a passion of mine. We each have so much to bring the conversation and time is pressing us to observe, converse, and merge our wisdom for the common good.

Socrates says ‘Wisdom starts with wonder’…

…as in wonderment of all that is wonderful in our world. It seems we only get bombarded with disaster, war, famine, mistreatment, injustice and pain. The world is writhing in agony in so many parts of the globe, near and far, yet I see also the clinks of light where human beings step into their wisdom.

Samuel Smiles said “We learn wisdom from failure much more than success. We often discover what will do by finding out what will not do: and probably those who never made a mistake never made a discovery.”

Some simple wisdom strategies:

• Put aside the constraints of your past for the possibility of a wise future (and if you don’t know what constrains you, then take a personal review journey with me)
• Do not fear your mistakes , know these provide ground to seed new discoveries (I have learned so much form my mistakes, I love ’em!)
• Allowing all (wise) views to come into your conversations, listen with your whole being not your pre conceptions and moral high ground (open your mind and heart to views outside your reasoning)
• Leave judgments and opinions outside the circle of conversation, hear wisdom from all corners of the world, draw the full square of life into a flow of inspiration (when the flow is stuck in an eddy, notice and then get paddling)
• Encourage good intentions and heartfelt expectations to raise everyone’s game, lead as you would leaded with unconditional love (life is about expansion or contraction, observe what is occurring for YOU not outside of you)
• Focus on sharing always in a consistent wise manner, join and leave every conversation inspired to inspire others (be present to the moment, this is NOW and the only space we have, take time to ‘wonder’ about all that is)

In my experience, wisdom is often mistaken for expertise or being clever – NO – wisdom does not happen because we think we know the answer, only when we don’t know what we don’t know, and we’re OK about not knowing, then we open up a space for wisdom to transform our lives… and magic conversations occur!

Join me for Magical Conversations in Richmond, starting from mid-May; dates and venue to be announced, register your interest by emailing me at pauline@magicalconversations.co.uk

Learning new stuff everyday

WOW

Day 15 of the 30 day Blog Challenge and I have learned so much.

I have managed to write every day – even though several times near midnight, even dealt with the whole thing on my blackberry writing the text in memo pad and copy pasting into Word Press on the blackberry screen!

I even received a text accolade from my son when I managed to take the ‘short link’ and post on twitter AND facebook. His shock and pleasure at my grasp of technology and social media was great to receive! It made me laugh out loud that when I suggested I wanted to know how to post photos too on my blackberry/ facebook that I received a prompt “not so fast, don’t get too big for your boots!”

Could it be that I might get too good for him! Challenging his generation’s way of connecting. I guess maybe I am getting into a style not desirable for a grandma?

This is a new age – for us all – and those who desire to be anything they want to be, can be.

At this half way mark I have discovered:

• We can learn everything we want, when we want, at any age we want – if we want!
• The most daunting task is not so once mastered; it appears to get simpler as we practice.
• The habit of anything takes practice – writing is available to anyone. Desire is the key ingredient.
• Its fun, it’s friendly, it’s rewarding, its mind stretching, its growth…
• The whole series could be chapters of a book.
• To be “retweeted” is extraordinarily wonderful complimentary and gives one a feel good factor!
• To be “retweeted” by complete strangers is even better!!
• The more I continue, the more I learn, the more I grow, the more I feel I am a writer after all.

The last point is poignant as at school I hated spelling classes, not least because I couldn’t spell. I have always felt I am a wee bit dyslexic if that is possible. Anyway, I soon decided that as I couldn’t spell, I wouldn’t read much, or write much that was to be examined. I was really good at Maths and numbers gave me no problem, so I steered away from the WORDS bit!

So I left school with the minimum O level English, in the written language experience, and vowed never to write a book – or indeed read too many. Curiously I wrote a detailed diary instead and of course made hundreds of mistakes where never read as no one got near that book. As I review my life, I realize how that decision that I was no good with words nearly thwarted my author potential!

My book is coming !

Always know desire and learning create magic, and watch this space for my book called ‘Who’s in Charge’ a story book about men and women and now we struggle to recognize there’s more than one type of each. Six characters, 3 men and 3 women, come together to solve a problem and save the world from disaster. Their journey charts a dynamic course from chaos to clearing, from battles to buddies, from distrusting each other to dancing together as they forge a new way to be who they need to be.

Do they transform and save our world? Watch, wait and wonder!

Visioning your future NOW!

Why wait for tomorrow to start your vision today?

Place in view, not just in your head. Don’t be shy of what you dream about passionately. Put it right, left and centre, know that what you don’t know now will turn up, set intentions through your visioning and watch it flow towards you.

“What rubbish” I hear you whisper in your head – surely my vision, my dream, and my passion is best kept inside incase others put me off and say it’s too daring, too outside of my ability… “It’s a secret because I dare not say what others might ridicule.” You pronounce the death knoll on your pioneering vision ‘in case the arrows in your back hurt you!!!

Well I am here to tell you – get out of your own way and watch it occur.

Pauline's Vision Board Autumn 2010


Here is my vision board from last autumn – and already, I am ready for a revised and extended vision i.e. to host my own chat TV show interviewing extraordinary women and men who bring diverse and extraordinarily transforming ideas to life, business, and entrepreneurship, and influence social change and create philanthropic operations that delve deep into unknown territory to save the world from pain.

I am meeting with all the amazing people because I seek amazing people, I have already a line-up of top women to interview about what is really needed to transform our recession hit boardroom and really give Lord Davies a radical shake up!! I am asking senior guys too to come onto the interview couch; and I plan more hosting of ‘Magical Conversations’ across corporate land.

I always set my intentions in my vision board and then in my conversations (I talk and connect a lot) and now have celebrities and entrepreneurial opportunities to interview; both men and women of all ages – I even have a fabulous group of 16/17year olds who’d like to be in conversation with the boardrooms of UK. Now that will be a magical conversation to watch!

So what is happening here?

I explain this work using vision boards and intentions today to a new and dear friend, Maryam, who is on a mission to spread transformation education through Persian TV – now this is her homeland, her passion is raw, is new, is seeded by Landmark Education and a Forum we both experienced last weekend. Yet she had planned to keep her vision a secret – NO I say to her, bring it to life! She is now.

So here are the steps;

1. Know your vision needs to come from your inner passion – don’t just think it, write it down, mind-map it, draw it….. Do chat to close friends, don’t get put down, but be reasonable as well as unreasonable.
2. Be clear about what your vision intends to be, do, achieve- both for you in your life and for others in the world
3. Know your part , your role, your desires and abilities within your dream of the vision
4. Create your vision board – pictures, words, textures – that give a picture of the essence of your vision in very practical terms…
5. Put a picture of you in the middle – it’s your vision, your dream, and will influence the way you lead your life
6. Talk about it from your passion and for the benefits and results it brings … “my passion is to bring inspiration and motivation to people; to transform the country (then the world)… and get my message to its destination through interviews and presence in TV/media”
7. With your vision board finished and mounted on the wall – photograph it and put on your screensaver as well …and then when you see, you will be inspired
8. Answer questions and speak with passion – so when anyone else sees your vision board and they offer help, say YES and THANKS as often as you can and follow through with a review even if the lead comes to nothing!

People love to help us and yet so often we don’t set a clear intention about our vision and with purpose- say with responsible passion, own it, share it, allow people to bring you possibilities (however remote) and always be grateful for every link in the chain of your purpose fulfilled.

My vision boards have always helped me spring into action, take a confident lead, transform my experience in life and in business and move me closer to my current dream; to be the host of a Magical Conversations Chat Show, inspiring viewers through extraordinary people to take action to achieve a joyful, happy and abundant society for us all.

And if you have any dreams unrealized, let me know and come to one of my vision board creation sessions. Contact me on pauline@magicalconversations.co.uk And if you know anyone in Persian TV, contact me for Maryam!!

The perfect TIME is right now

Do we often try too hard to challenge TIME? And then wonder why we are not getting what we believe we deserve? We put TIME under pressure and the more we try, the less TIME we have. We want more, we want it now, we want to speed TIME up. Contrarily, when we don’t want to get old, we want TIME to slow down. The more TIME pressure we exert on ourselves everyday (getting frustrated because we think it’s caused by obstacles outside of us), do we blame the world for all those things that don’t turn up? Do we say there’s just not enough TIME in each day?

When I allow myself to feel that way and am impatient for instance that contracts are not turning up that I have pushed hard on, or emails are not being responded too fast enough, or meetings get pushed back when I have prepared for hours to present my case, who’s stopping the natural flow of time and effort merging into a seamless flow? It’s me.

Having transformed my whole existence in the first quarter of this year, unsticking that which was stuck i.e. my place of residence, my surroundings, my excess baggage, I am now experiencing a whole new view of TIME in my life through being in a different place.

I have allowed TIME to help me slow down and flow. I have made choices that underpin an inner realization that if I am not being my best, doing what I do best and feel honestly in tune with, then nothing will arrive on this path. This is what I teach my clients to value, so I needed to set my own life into the right TIME and motion.

It is when I slowed down to the natural speed of TIME that I saw things differently. I now notice what I had not seen before, and I sense the path beneath my feet, I feel more grounded, I love the breeze on my face, the rhythm of my physical movements as I rise every day, the spring in my walk across my bridge every morning, the ease of smiles with strangers on my journey.

I recognize a shifting sense of the new, still tempered with the past wisdom but fresh now with ideas, insights, patterns, words, and new definitions of potential and future gifts that I can share with my family, friends and clients as I create my successes and grow my desired outcomes.

We can’t argue with TIME (we get the same 24 hours each); we can mis-use it, we can abuse it, we can steal it from others by bad time management; we could nurture and value every moment and use wisely, honouring TIME in our world. Maybe assess TIME as a friend not an enemy, and see what comes to be.

To help us notice TIME in a new way:

T Thinking – use your whole brain; don’t be concerned about what you think; notice what you think; become an observer of your thoughts; know that not all your thoughts are useful; use those which feel good and positive, and let the others go…
I Intuition – sense equilibrium in the swirl of time around you; know that balance is personal, physical, mental, emotional; tune into that inner-sense and innocence within; listen; breathe; exhale as you go with the flow of the day…
M Motivation – be moved by the rhythm of your own body first; observe if you are flowing with others or against; try going with the flow of conversation around you; create energy in your flow like whirl pools in a river, watch for rocks (obstacles) and go around then easily (welcome the thrill!)
E Execution – act on TIME; be on TIME; allow TIME to inform rather than direct your day; we each have the same 24 hours to play with! (DO PLAY!!!)

If time seems evasive, observe why, let go, and thank TIME for helping you to recognize the moment. Stop and breathe. Apply TIME to your business, to your relationships, to your life, and watch the magic that emerges.

Compassion as a business necessity

Compassion is not religious business, it is human business, it is not luxury, it is essential for our own peace and mental stability, it is essential for human survival. -The Dalai Lama

I was really struck by this quote and started to muse on why people in business are still not valuing their natural ability be ‘compassionate’ for each other in the workplace. Is it because it is deemed too emotional in its purest form to add value in monetary terms and therefore can’t be added to the ledger?

Yet compassion for me is the most valuable measure of business when seen in good leadership, a trusting workforce culture, and healthy retention of clients and customers. It is a natural way forward to preserve good health and vitality of our employees – and is core energy for getting on with everyone. I am talking here of a true compassion, as the Dalai Lama talks of, which embraces daily love, supports fairness, trust, respect and care for every man and woman.

Yet I am often told, you can’t talk like this in business, you have to talk about hard tangible benefits. Tough times need tough measures.

I disagree. This is exactly the time to turn around your life and your business, right from top to bottom, with love and compassion. Own it, be it, see the results. CEOs and top Boards are now seeing the growth of a strong female economy, changing requirements of women and men to be on par, accepted on their natural merits, each doing what they do best – together with compassion and not judgment.

How do you cope with adversity and chaos in today’s tricky economic climate? People too often blame others when the key to unlock is within. In hard measurable terms, if we don’t unlock this key, then we suffer, relationships suffer and business success goes out of the window.

I believe in our natural endless capacity to love and feel compassion for each other and that as a human race we have the ability and the desire to seek new ways and create a buoyant, abundant, collaborative world were all count, all add their own unique value, everyone counts. I know in my deepest essence that I am part of a whole existence that covers not just this day, but all the past and future that is. I share the responsibility for our world and see the natural energy of co-creation with us.

Working with men and women in diverse arenas, generations and situations, I see men and women holding the two halves of a whole solution, yet not creating a new blueprint together. Is it that, stuck as we are in an old pattern that does not serve us any more, we stubbornly refuse to believe that there is another way – the men stay tough and resistant to change, focused on targets, survival, power and profit; the women too often opt out of their feminine softness and take on the mantle of business the tough way. Neither side needs to stay fixed and rooted in either. I am encouraged by the ground swell of women today wanting to be in business and the news that the ‘female economy’ is being noticed by men when it comes to wealth managers and the growing wealth of women across the world. However we still haven’t got to grips with the bigger conversation that can embrace all women, their needs, all men and their needs, and most importantly the needs of a fragile changing world. Economies are constrained by overspend and cutbacks and we are told that we’re in for a period of austerity in the tabloid press. Women can make a difference to the future by stretching the new playing field into the natural domain of female needs rather than playing hard ball in a man’s world.

I believe there is a new magic we can bring to our collective conversations which honours our core strengths as men and women and allows for new energy of female growth to come into business as a whole. If we only calculate success of women by their wealth capability, we may ignore the contributions of those women who excel in other non-profit ways. We can ensure a more balanced ownership of true wealth to emerge easily when we add compassion to business and seek equity and fairness within every conversation. I know this will increase the profitline of the whole business and ensure everyone has a healthy life. Healthy, wealthy and wise may be a simple combination worth remembering.

My contribution is to teach people to step in the space they need to deliver their best. I help them to value their inner wisdom, and to be able to join every conversation with compassion.

I host “Magical Conversations” with invited groups of senior men and women to explore how to step into that natural space and be themselves, truly happy, to add loving energy to human business. My own life purpose is to bring harmony, collaboration and serious intention to merge life and business together, and to establish a simpler, more effective way to connect to likeminded people for greater success. I set up these conversations up to set a new pace for life for me and for my clients; a pace to think with my heart and to embrace a new truth about how I/we can co-create a wonderful new business plan for living and work merged together.

As in many mergers, we need to be aware of people’s needs, of bringing together differing cultures together. In the merger of men and women we still haven’t fully understood the natural value of our differences and how beneficial we are to each other. We need to explore how to dissolve all the confusion which goes with old thinking rather than new feelings and demystify the ‘gender code’ about stereotypes, barriers, egos and pre-conceptions. Let’s begin again with the best of the past and an open consideration for the future, and build a new blueprint for business that embraces life and measures love on the bottom line!

Transformed with compassion, the merger of men and women will grow a new culture of energy, loving intentions for growth and profit …and, most important to me, a era of positive loving business behaviour!

Time for transformation – and magical conversations!

The month of May has brought transformation in my life as well as in the political climate in the UK.
This time of the year always has a transformational nature; with blossom arriving and grass freshened with the spring dews. The sun warms us up and helps us to feel happier. We watch this happening with all-consuming regularity and do not necessarily value the natural evolution right in front of our eyes.

May has brought new leadership in the UK – a coalition of two parties, two leaders, David Cameron and Nick Clegg, a duo walking together from two different points of political view with one singular common purpose – to make the UK a strong, safe, robust and healthy place to live! Watching these two men come together in the Rose Garden at No 10 on May 11th, an astrological day of relationship harmony, was truly magical. They walked, talked and lead in what appears to be a trusting, open, sharing yet purposeful manner. Their personal natures subtly entwined, sharing a wonderful blend of masculine and feminine energy in their presentation, even though both are men.

Why do I observe and comment on this?

Not because of “the politics” – but because I observed, on that day and since, we are watching the natural possibility that two differing political ‘enemies’ can now work together as ‘allies’, and can actually create far more together than separately! Many of my female friends suggested that there should have been more females in the cabinet – and I reflected in my last blog that there was considerable lack of female opinion running up the election. Although I too desire a more balanced number of women in politics – I’m happy that this partnership is, at this moment in time, the best partnership. Cameron and Clegg are very different in terms of their gender dynamics and yet similar enough to be good collaborators in a world that needs them to be so. This is the right ‘male’ partnership to challenge the “old boys club”, the traditional ‘nay sayers’ who don’t believe significant transformation of our society is necessary. This partnership can give birth to a new balanced opportunity for survival and growth that embraces all types of men and women, from all generations and of all diverse natures. We now need to help them do this, planting a new ‘playing field’, one which harvests new types of crops that feed both male and female needs in totality.

Cameron and Clegg are two very different gender types from the male gender and can naturally bring balance. Cameron has a more ‘masculine’ male brain yet intelligently has learned to use a highly tuned relationship style of language that complements Clegg’s natural softer, more lyrical ‘feminine’ male brain, using more intuitive and emotional language. They both grasp the need to use strong male energy and direct serious actions while keeping focused on the possibility of a UK vision and a future sustainability yet unknown but desired by most. For me, the fact they are both men gives the duo leadership a solidarity that is needed to counter the many cynical alpha men who believe our current difficulties in the markets and across social disturbances are merely a blip and we will return to ‘normality’ once the crisis is over. We need a wholly new way forward and that does mean, I hope, that these men recognise the need to bring in more female players but it’s important that they do this for the right reasons and not just for a quota.

The magic continues for me. The Cameron-Clegg partnership shows that anything is possible and we don’t have to do the “same-old, same-old” which has brought us to catastrophic economic downturn, problematic social issues and environmental disasters. We can build new possibilities and bring together new collaborations without knowing exactly what will result from discussions; we can come together with a common purpose – that impacts all of us!

I believe that this opening up of explorations for innovative solutions for economic and social change is exactly the journey we are required to face up to as a human race. There is no return to the past. We need to shed a new light on how we engage everyone, all stakeholders in society and use our natural resources, and especially recognize how men and women, together, co-create a more sustainable model for our society, our economy and our world.

For me, it is key that we bring a new plan into place – a plan that allows for all men and women to get together to co-create a new future for this planet. A big plan starting with each of us…for me, Cameron and Clegg have opened up a political ‘magical conversation’ at the top level and opened the floodgates for me to explore the unexpected in my own work with my corporate clients about how they can step into the future via conversation.

“Exploring the future” comes to life for me in the many conversations I have had in my life – and I am delighted that in May, being that transformational birthday month for me, I launched my first official ‘Magical Conversation’ last Monday in Geneva.

I had been researching, talking, and discussing these ideas for 9 months since September 2009. I had brought my own transformational path together within my Corporate Heart consultancy and my personal passion to eradicate ‘bad behaviour’ in the workplace and evolve a healthy natural excellence, a work culture that is balanced, connected, purposeful and performance at its best.

So now, building on my twenty year study of people in business and watching the current challenges, I decided to bring ‘Magical Conversations’ to the forefront of my work. In a world of amazing synchronistic links, I found myself hosted by a wonderful woman, Fabienne Feldman, in her beautiful home in Geneva on May 31st and welcomed 10 highly inspiration business women together. Our goal in this first conversation was exciting – to explore the relationship of women, business and life – and discuss how we might transform the current imbalance of prominent women in a world so often designed by men for men, and share our stories that create our history as women, in the business world, in philanthropy and in social communities.

‘Magical Conversations’ are designed to bring small groups, up to 12 people together at a time, in a safe sacred circle of open chairs, to contribute openly and with perfect self expression, respecting everyone’s view and looking at innovative possibilities around current topics such as economic revival and social change. The intention is to ensure everyone enjoys contributing: everyone learns, shares and leaves more enriched than when they arrive: knowing what they will do differently; and why they will continue to explore and expand their own magical conversations wherever they go.

Last Monday’s magic worked, we were in a perfect place, and the atmosphere was loving and giving, 11 women intent on creating a new vision for our world. Our conversations inspired, challenged, probed and opened our eyes to the ‘feminine’ attributes that women bring to the party, the nature of ‘giving back’ that entrepreneurial women often seek, and the passion we all have for being part of the solution with men – we challenged each other as to how women can be heard more on a world stage for justice and true equity – and we explored the issues of sisterhood that we don’t always get right yet!

We agreed that, in order to transform our world, we each will take responsibility for our own actions; and, leading by example, share our stories in a format that can be heard by all. We pledged to return to hold more conversations and to attract more women – and men – to explore in the same way. The magical journey of transformation begins…

May has brought Spring – new growth, green shoots, bright light and great hope; June now sets the summer into full swing, turns up the heat and sets the magic alight, how often nature shows us the way and we only need to look and listen more to know the truth.

What will the Autumn bring? We can harvest the magic or the misery, let’s make an inspired choice.

The orchard by Gallaher

Little seeds we tend to sew
create a world of life unknown,
Around each corner around each bend,
The fruits of labour blossom begin..
What kind of seeds do we choose to sew?
Are we aware, do we know?
Observe the harvest as it will tell
A life of heaven …or a living hell?

“Magical Conversations” will be held in Geneva and London on regular basis, we welcome top business men and women to explore the key issues of today. Call + 44 208 998 7032 for more details.

Leaving a legacy – set your intention now!

I met amazing Philanthropreneurs this week – a mixture of Philanthroper and Entrepreneur – and was lucky to be on a panel discussing this new concept, originated in the US, now being embraced by many motivated entrepreneurs who wish to ‘give back’ in the way they know best. The event was for the charity Education Africaand they have a wonderful entrepreneurial spirit in how they are developing their teaching style with children in Africa to grow strong minds as well as healthy bodies.

I was inspired to be part of the evening panel ‘ Philanthropreneur – The next generation defined’ and to learn more about this style of being, in deed a way of innovating and taking risk around new business ideas, creating wealth and yet ‘giving back’ in an energetic business way that enables the receiver and the giver to become enriched emotionally, spiritually, physically and materially. I felt as if I had come home and it felt good to me to develop my business with this new style, giving back as we grow.

Philanthropreneurs have a plentiful ‘possibility’ mindsets, very open hearts, a great sense of timing and innovation, aligned to a high world vision with a well balanced self less ego, and of course a pioneering eye line to the future…nothing is impossible ! If we are to leave a legacy that lasts for many generations after we have moved on, this feels to be the right way, to start now.

A couple of summers ago I wrote my ‘obituary’ – sounds odd maybe, however it is a valuable way to put yourself into the far future and create your legacy statement now (it can always grow and change however once written you’ll be amazed at what happens as soon as it is on paper!!)

Having decided that I will live to 101 (at least) I then stretched my imagination into that year, closed my eyes and looked what I would love to exist for my children and my grandchildren and my world, for friends I know and those I have yet to touch and for all I may never meet but are part of my global family.

I envisaged a new harmonic in the air, an abundant sense of love in the world, where life and work were balanced, where women and men had healthy choices over their careers and family lives, where children were educated with an authentic love and emotional energy that grew strong caring imaginative intelligent adults, who respect the environment and enjoy the natural beauty of the world. A world where major powers are empowering their people rather than fighting to right wrongs; where poverty was irradicated; a world where men and women live in harmony recognising the limitations of our natural planet resources and using them wisely. There will be a new community energy across the land, magical conversations daily, wisdom and joy alive in both work and play, and who knows what other exciting unknowns!!

In my legacy, I had eliminated ‘bad behaviour’ in the workplace, and gone on to set up The SMILE FOUNDATION as a core part of education across the world providing core curriculum classes in Sound, Movement, Imagination, Laughter and Energy to underpin the range of skills based teaching to inform a new generation of healthy adults. I had also written several books gender, relationships, happiness and fun; had various TV series, married again and enjoyed a happy healthy family life myself!

I just read my ‘orbituary’ now two years on and I am amazed how much has already started to set my plans in place… the power of good intentions is strong and we don’t need to do more than that and act on it. So what has happened; I have meet the most amazing like minded people, found an environment, The Monastery, where magical conversations are starting to happen about ‘Corporate Spirit’ and ways to bring a Spirit and Purpose to all organizations to make this world a better place to be… and now the law of attraction has brought opportunities to me to meet the influential senior players, men and women, who can transform from the Boardroom to create ‘wellness’ in trusted cultures across the UK. There are possibilties abounding for TV programmes, my book is started and interest found, and I am thoroughly enjoying my journey. Smiling all the way!!!

Set you intention, write your legacy way into the future, make a contract with yourself today and join the conversation with us NOW.

“The best thing about the future is that it comes only one day at a time”.
American President Abraham Lincoln (1809-1865)