Business, relationships, sex and snow!

A new era of conversations is required – it’s not about men versus women or the survival of the fittest but “survival for all, abundantly” working together to create magic.

It’s been a hugely transformational 2011 that has led us all to this year, and the bad stories have not gone away in 2012! Where are we going? The New Year of the Dragon sky tells a story of fire and fun maybe?

Major financial issues attack us on every news report, EU confusion and mayhem, top men tumble and top women get isolated from the marzipan layer of females who just haven’t risen to the top yet, social unrest rides high in youth communities, vulnerable women and children grow greater in numbers, as do prison inmates; education is under the critical spotlight, students rebel or just stop going to university, the NHS crumbles more, the Government is challenged at home and abroad; hacking, benefits scandals and unemployment figures rise. BUSINESS is sticky. We’re still having the “same old same old conversations” and nothing gets better. I have friends who just don’t watch the news at all!

Then SNOW came this last weekend brought a kind of strange release from such matters and a crisis once more brought people together, everyone helping sliding cars to stay on the road and people get home even after hours in freezing conditions. Today the snow has gone from my street and the world looks pretty much the same.

Why is it we see the magic of human kindness only in crisis?

With many like minded enlightened circles of friends and mentors, I see the requirement for people is to collaborate, to share resources and to realize there is a different blueprint required. Collaborative living and working, full of conversations about collective consciousness and practical application come to the fore for me. A wonderful balance of the material and the esoteric, task and relationship, operation and service. We need both men and women to be responsible co-parents if we are to survive and thrive as a society and a sustainable economy. These thoughts impact the way I see ‘business and life’ merging and coming together as there is no longer a defined separation in that relationship. This merger has come mainly through the influx and growth of women wanting careers, business recognizing markets are changing, consumers being more feminine and men recognizing business is about RELATIONSHIPS and service; entrepreneurism is growing at a rate of knots, and philanthropy and social responsibility are key to our overall fulfillment and meaning of life. Our old paradigm economic foundations are now shaking in the very concrete pillars of our once stable male world and many struggle with leaping into a new paradigm of the unknown.

Is this a battle or a game? Maybe SEX does get in the way?

It sounds like I’m full of doom and gloom, however I am very positive and incredibly excited about this year – the crisis of collapse will shake us all together at last? Men and women will maybe own their true authentic nature, SEX will play a part and we will all have to do things different whether we like it or not. We’re all humans, we have needs and that surely our passion for life itself is the main force of renewal and hope?

It’s now time to take on board a serious paradigm shift for 2012

It’s now time to get serious about new ways of working, living, connecting, sharing, and survival for all. The old ethos was ‘the survival of the fittest’ and in that paradigm we shall no doubt continue to experience battling between the sexes both on a business and political stage but also in the streets of our towns and in our own backyards. If we shift our thinking to ‘survival for all, abundantly’ we grow hope and prosperity of mind, body and soul. However we need trust in all we do and each other. We need to open up trusted conversations, let our egos go to the wall and enter a circle of human value as key to renewal. I do believe indeed we have all the resources we need right here, right now and, with care, men and women can co-create a much healthier wiser world that will emerge through coming together in magical conversations.

I do believe the way we unpack the conundrum about women rising further in business, and maintaining their natural female attributes to co-create with men at the top…. is to get the men talking! I am convinced that women will never make the top in greater numbers unless men have a mind-shift change that allows them ownership of a new blueprint to do business in ways that will suit women.

Do read our latest research on MEN it shows that men really do want things to be different but don’t know how to hold the conversation. Call us now to learn more or go www.corporateheart.co.uk for our programmes for men.

MEN ONLY PROGRAMME for men who want to learn to be more aware of how they manage everyone – this would embrace gender aspects, communication barriers, relationship mastery, dialogue and professional presence among a range of topics, allowing men an opportunity to own the conversation in a closed male group, guided by our experts.

Advertisements

What is a magical conversation?

What is a magical conversation? I have been asked this many times and it’s hard to say exactly although you surely know when a conversation has been miserable!

That is one that makes your blood drain away or boil.

It’s a conversation that isn’t actually a conversation as it is one sided, even when more than one person is talking.

It can be full of tears and/or fears, angry words or can just be downright boring. Have you ever sat in those and wondered why you are there?

You play your part.

Miserable conversations take place the whole time, at work and at home, in shops, on the streets, on the tubes, in pubs, in bars, in restaurants, across families, across nations, across continents. You observe the silent conversations where not a word is said as you sip your beer.

You are responsible.

The worst is still to come – the conversation that starts wars – the controversial conversation, the blind conversations, the bigoted conversation. The vitriolic conversations that create divorce, achromous settlement conversations; the legal battles conversations; the conversations without resolve; the embittered conversation; and the unspoken bereavement conversations.

You are able to transform.

“Magical conversations” came into my life from an early age and really ran through my life. There were many of these conversations around the breakfast table when I was a kid. As I grew up and realized my awkward teens and then found adulthood, I had the miserable ones too of course! Yet I always was attracted to magical ones and to creating them too. I didn’t necessarily call them that then. I received a delightful comment from my daughter, Gemma, some two years when she said “you know Mum, you should call yourself the president of magical conversations, as you make them wherever you go” Thank you to her.

I listened and took the comment on board. I felt President was a tad grand although I do preside over such events now. I started to say to people that I was the “Ambassador of Magical Conversations” and it attract both interest and intrigue and indeed started people switched on to what they said, the intent they used and the effect they had on others.

It takes a tuned in person to know when they have switched someone else on … or off! When we step into that magical conversation of inspired trust, respectful observation, openness and honesty, welcoming contributions from diverse minds, encompassing all views and listening with two ears and speaking in turn, we create a sacred space that holds no barriers to magical outcomes. My dear friend and colleague Richard had evolved a passion to hold ‘third space meetings’ in 2009 and create that sacred space for all to share. This fulfilled my nature of magical conversations because the space provided the final ingredient, the fertile ground for voices to be heard. Those attending always went out with a smile and an air of joy.

The events we hold now are helping in many senior corporate circles and in our own lives and can work anywhere.

Magical Conversations are magical because we know not what we might create at the start; we merely hold the intention for a third space between us, we state the topic in principle, state the guidelines and allow the seeds of the conversation to germinate and grow into collaborative results. This style of conversation can be used anywhere any time for amazing results, in the boardroom they can turn businesses around, in families they can change children’s future lives.

Magical conversations have three core requests from all participating …

• To enter with full intention to listen, to contribute, to share, to care, to observe, to speak and to invite a wide diversity of contributions to whatever the central subject or topic is being regarded.
• To park any egos outside the door, to bar judgments and opinions, yet share from experience, giving evidence and stories to help where required, allowing conjecture if given permission by the collective, and always keeping the space safe for all to be there.
• To leave the conversation knowing you have given truly, and received richly, have helped everyone feel inspired and lifted, enlightened and expanded the conversation.

Any conversation can be magical, a quick conversation at the bus stop; a long business conversation in the boardroom; an intimate conversation of friends; a romantic duo out on a first date.

A magical conversation flows, it winds, it laughs, it cries, it surprises and it confirms the unconditional love and acceptance of difference between all parties. This is a true loving communication between human beings, as we all have been given the gift to communicate, whether by voice or sign language, in English or any national dialect, inter-generationally or in peer group parties.

Where talking happens, conversations thrive. Magical Conversations never die.

Learning new stuff everyday

WOW

Day 15 of the 30 day Blog Challenge and I have learned so much.

I have managed to write every day – even though several times near midnight, even dealt with the whole thing on my blackberry writing the text in memo pad and copy pasting into Word Press on the blackberry screen!

I even received a text accolade from my son when I managed to take the ‘short link’ and post on twitter AND facebook. His shock and pleasure at my grasp of technology and social media was great to receive! It made me laugh out loud that when I suggested I wanted to know how to post photos too on my blackberry/ facebook that I received a prompt “not so fast, don’t get too big for your boots!”

Could it be that I might get too good for him! Challenging his generation’s way of connecting. I guess maybe I am getting into a style not desirable for a grandma?

This is a new age – for us all – and those who desire to be anything they want to be, can be.

At this half way mark I have discovered:

• We can learn everything we want, when we want, at any age we want – if we want!
• The most daunting task is not so once mastered; it appears to get simpler as we practice.
• The habit of anything takes practice – writing is available to anyone. Desire is the key ingredient.
• Its fun, it’s friendly, it’s rewarding, its mind stretching, its growth…
• The whole series could be chapters of a book.
• To be “retweeted” is extraordinarily wonderful complimentary and gives one a feel good factor!
• To be “retweeted” by complete strangers is even better!!
• The more I continue, the more I learn, the more I grow, the more I feel I am a writer after all.

The last point is poignant as at school I hated spelling classes, not least because I couldn’t spell. I have always felt I am a wee bit dyslexic if that is possible. Anyway, I soon decided that as I couldn’t spell, I wouldn’t read much, or write much that was to be examined. I was really good at Maths and numbers gave me no problem, so I steered away from the WORDS bit!

So I left school with the minimum O level English, in the written language experience, and vowed never to write a book – or indeed read too many. Curiously I wrote a detailed diary instead and of course made hundreds of mistakes where never read as no one got near that book. As I review my life, I realize how that decision that I was no good with words nearly thwarted my author potential!

My book is coming !

Always know desire and learning create magic, and watch this space for my book called ‘Who’s in Charge’ a story book about men and women and now we struggle to recognize there’s more than one type of each. Six characters, 3 men and 3 women, come together to solve a problem and save the world from disaster. Their journey charts a dynamic course from chaos to clearing, from battles to buddies, from distrusting each other to dancing together as they forge a new way to be who they need to be.

Do they transform and save our world? Watch, wait and wonder!

The perfect TIME is right now

Do we often try too hard to challenge TIME? And then wonder why we are not getting what we believe we deserve? We put TIME under pressure and the more we try, the less TIME we have. We want more, we want it now, we want to speed TIME up. Contrarily, when we don’t want to get old, we want TIME to slow down. The more TIME pressure we exert on ourselves everyday (getting frustrated because we think it’s caused by obstacles outside of us), do we blame the world for all those things that don’t turn up? Do we say there’s just not enough TIME in each day?

When I allow myself to feel that way and am impatient for instance that contracts are not turning up that I have pushed hard on, or emails are not being responded too fast enough, or meetings get pushed back when I have prepared for hours to present my case, who’s stopping the natural flow of time and effort merging into a seamless flow? It’s me.

Having transformed my whole existence in the first quarter of this year, unsticking that which was stuck i.e. my place of residence, my surroundings, my excess baggage, I am now experiencing a whole new view of TIME in my life through being in a different place.

I have allowed TIME to help me slow down and flow. I have made choices that underpin an inner realization that if I am not being my best, doing what I do best and feel honestly in tune with, then nothing will arrive on this path. This is what I teach my clients to value, so I needed to set my own life into the right TIME and motion.

It is when I slowed down to the natural speed of TIME that I saw things differently. I now notice what I had not seen before, and I sense the path beneath my feet, I feel more grounded, I love the breeze on my face, the rhythm of my physical movements as I rise every day, the spring in my walk across my bridge every morning, the ease of smiles with strangers on my journey.

I recognize a shifting sense of the new, still tempered with the past wisdom but fresh now with ideas, insights, patterns, words, and new definitions of potential and future gifts that I can share with my family, friends and clients as I create my successes and grow my desired outcomes.

We can’t argue with TIME (we get the same 24 hours each); we can mis-use it, we can abuse it, we can steal it from others by bad time management; we could nurture and value every moment and use wisely, honouring TIME in our world. Maybe assess TIME as a friend not an enemy, and see what comes to be.

To help us notice TIME in a new way:

T Thinking – use your whole brain; don’t be concerned about what you think; notice what you think; become an observer of your thoughts; know that not all your thoughts are useful; use those which feel good and positive, and let the others go…
I Intuition – sense equilibrium in the swirl of time around you; know that balance is personal, physical, mental, emotional; tune into that inner-sense and innocence within; listen; breathe; exhale as you go with the flow of the day…
M Motivation – be moved by the rhythm of your own body first; observe if you are flowing with others or against; try going with the flow of conversation around you; create energy in your flow like whirl pools in a river, watch for rocks (obstacles) and go around then easily (welcome the thrill!)
E Execution – act on TIME; be on TIME; allow TIME to inform rather than direct your day; we each have the same 24 hours to play with! (DO PLAY!!!)

If time seems evasive, observe why, let go, and thank TIME for helping you to recognize the moment. Stop and breathe. Apply TIME to your business, to your relationships, to your life, and watch the magic that emerges.

Compassion as a business necessity

Compassion is not religious business, it is human business, it is not luxury, it is essential for our own peace and mental stability, it is essential for human survival. -The Dalai Lama

I was really struck by this quote and started to muse on why people in business are still not valuing their natural ability be ‘compassionate’ for each other in the workplace. Is it because it is deemed too emotional in its purest form to add value in monetary terms and therefore can’t be added to the ledger?

Yet compassion for me is the most valuable measure of business when seen in good leadership, a trusting workforce culture, and healthy retention of clients and customers. It is a natural way forward to preserve good health and vitality of our employees – and is core energy for getting on with everyone. I am talking here of a true compassion, as the Dalai Lama talks of, which embraces daily love, supports fairness, trust, respect and care for every man and woman.

Yet I am often told, you can’t talk like this in business, you have to talk about hard tangible benefits. Tough times need tough measures.

I disagree. This is exactly the time to turn around your life and your business, right from top to bottom, with love and compassion. Own it, be it, see the results. CEOs and top Boards are now seeing the growth of a strong female economy, changing requirements of women and men to be on par, accepted on their natural merits, each doing what they do best – together with compassion and not judgment.

How do you cope with adversity and chaos in today’s tricky economic climate? People too often blame others when the key to unlock is within. In hard measurable terms, if we don’t unlock this key, then we suffer, relationships suffer and business success goes out of the window.

I believe in our natural endless capacity to love and feel compassion for each other and that as a human race we have the ability and the desire to seek new ways and create a buoyant, abundant, collaborative world were all count, all add their own unique value, everyone counts. I know in my deepest essence that I am part of a whole existence that covers not just this day, but all the past and future that is. I share the responsibility for our world and see the natural energy of co-creation with us.

Working with men and women in diverse arenas, generations and situations, I see men and women holding the two halves of a whole solution, yet not creating a new blueprint together. Is it that, stuck as we are in an old pattern that does not serve us any more, we stubbornly refuse to believe that there is another way – the men stay tough and resistant to change, focused on targets, survival, power and profit; the women too often opt out of their feminine softness and take on the mantle of business the tough way. Neither side needs to stay fixed and rooted in either. I am encouraged by the ground swell of women today wanting to be in business and the news that the ‘female economy’ is being noticed by men when it comes to wealth managers and the growing wealth of women across the world. However we still haven’t got to grips with the bigger conversation that can embrace all women, their needs, all men and their needs, and most importantly the needs of a fragile changing world. Economies are constrained by overspend and cutbacks and we are told that we’re in for a period of austerity in the tabloid press. Women can make a difference to the future by stretching the new playing field into the natural domain of female needs rather than playing hard ball in a man’s world.

I believe there is a new magic we can bring to our collective conversations which honours our core strengths as men and women and allows for new energy of female growth to come into business as a whole. If we only calculate success of women by their wealth capability, we may ignore the contributions of those women who excel in other non-profit ways. We can ensure a more balanced ownership of true wealth to emerge easily when we add compassion to business and seek equity and fairness within every conversation. I know this will increase the profitline of the whole business and ensure everyone has a healthy life. Healthy, wealthy and wise may be a simple combination worth remembering.

My contribution is to teach people to step in the space they need to deliver their best. I help them to value their inner wisdom, and to be able to join every conversation with compassion.

I host “Magical Conversations” with invited groups of senior men and women to explore how to step into that natural space and be themselves, truly happy, to add loving energy to human business. My own life purpose is to bring harmony, collaboration and serious intention to merge life and business together, and to establish a simpler, more effective way to connect to likeminded people for greater success. I set up these conversations up to set a new pace for life for me and for my clients; a pace to think with my heart and to embrace a new truth about how I/we can co-create a wonderful new business plan for living and work merged together.

As in many mergers, we need to be aware of people’s needs, of bringing together differing cultures together. In the merger of men and women we still haven’t fully understood the natural value of our differences and how beneficial we are to each other. We need to explore how to dissolve all the confusion which goes with old thinking rather than new feelings and demystify the ‘gender code’ about stereotypes, barriers, egos and pre-conceptions. Let’s begin again with the best of the past and an open consideration for the future, and build a new blueprint for business that embraces life and measures love on the bottom line!

Transformed with compassion, the merger of men and women will grow a new culture of energy, loving intentions for growth and profit …and, most important to me, a era of positive loving business behaviour!

Finding our natural pace to think with our hearts

Holiday in Spain

Having just returned from 7 days of sunshine in Spain, relaxing and switching off, I recognize the power within that I have mis-used lately by pushing myself too hard. I was staying too much in my head and not ‘thinking’ about my heart.

I recognized that if I care to notice what is happening within my whole body, and not just my physical being, I would be rather scared to see how out of control I am in my inner world! For all of us, our minds, hearts and spirits mesh together within our body structure; we are indeed created perfectly yet we abuse our own source of power every day by staying in our heads too much…and so we can damage not just our own bodies but all those we impact day to day…and ultimately everyone in our world.

My passion is to enable people to see, feel, hear and understand their natural self – their natural talent, wisdom and courage – to be all that they are, everyday, the ‘star’ that they are born to be. Yet I have not walked my talk. A bit of self-indulgence would do me no harm and indeed a lot of good. My week in Spain allowed me to get out of my head and into my heart. Watching my grandchildren of 2½ and 4 months allowed me time to see that core perfection we are all born with, the growth in those young months and years, the simplicity of children’s laughter and the delight of tiny steps. My heart started feeling and my mind took a self-indulgent rest. I reviewed my own progress alongside theirs.

2010 progression

My year has progressed well. I honoured the childlike excitement at the many opportunities that have arisen this year, and my choice to do that which I am attracted to; to revamp my own core business Corporate Heart; get involved with Magical Conversations with senior level movers and shakers so transformation can be accelerated across the UK corporate world; and interview top women about their own challenges in the world of work; I had forgotten as a single woman, in her sixties, that however motivated and energetic I am, I am also not superwoman!

My ability to draw on my higher energies, override physical and mental exhaustion and deliver inspirational impact to my clients and influencing circles is simply not realistic without breaks. I realized what I already knew but had forgotten, i.e. that pressure needs to be counter with a sensible sustainability strategy for life and re-balancing of the work overload that we take on as women. We need to be self indulgent on occasions!

Balance in our lives

Our ability to self indulge is key to a balanced and fulfilled life and success…permeating ever pore of our existence. We are human beings – not human doings! We need to care for the ‘body’ we have been given and be grateful for the amazing combination of interlinked and meshed pieces, many millions of atoms set to our personal dial.

Women under pressure

To keep up with success, women often feel they need to work at pressures which are unrealistic to our maximum female ‘healthy’ potential output. Men do work too hard too but, over 2 centuries they have designed a plan for work that is not made for women, men do have more physical strength and a single minded, task-focused capability born into them. It’s actually a simple equation. 24/7 global business has been designed for men. Yet we need workers to work globally and locally, men and women, and have families, responsibilities for elderly relatives, social lives, community tasks and a life other than work! Women want to pay more attention to these aspects and see ‘life’ and work intricately meshed. Many men don’t. They have a reasonable thinking ability to separate ‘life’ from work even when they have caring responsible natures, they work in different ways,

Now here goes my logical head again… it’s a ‘no brainer’, as they say, to look after our assets. We’ve heard it so many times; invest in our people, our finest assets yet business has set a plan for women to fail, not because they are weak or incapable, but because business is still mainly task focused, achievement-orientated, measured, male-operated version of work! Business doesn’t value the huge natural value of women both in business, economically, and in life, economically. Women perform many caring ‘tasks’ that never get factored into the bottom line.

Of course, many women have entered the world of work and coped with the pressure and are fantastic business achievers. But not enough in pure numbers to be an influence to change the nature of business. Many have sacrificed their life in terms of families and happiness to do so. On the practical level, the facts speak for themselves – and companies are challenged to retain women at senior levels. Attracting and keeping women into higher levels of business is not a ‘nice to have’ –it’s a business case for our economic and social survival. At an emotional level, the world needs to address the balance of needs from both men and women. Do read Avivah Wittenberg-Cox’s new book “How Women mean Business” for the latest facts on who’s doing the best.

The UN vote for WOMEN

At last, and at a world level, we have the UN recognizing that around the world women are marginalized not only in underdeveloped countries but also in developed countries where we still don’t see women represented proportionally in business boardrooms or political fields. The UN will commence an agency for Women in January. I am delighted – althought I hope the reality is seriously active and able to radically shift the way we run the world together.

http://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/politics/un-celebrates-a-watershed-day-for-women-2017929.html

So how will this affect us all? I hope it’s another major step in the journey I am on to bring men and women to a deeper and more valuable understanding of our individual and collective human needs over purely wealth creation for the sake of stock piling fortunes into the hands of a few.

A man said to me “if the wealth of the world was in the hands of women, we would have no poverty” because women feed their babies, women care for life itself. Women bring a new understanding and rationale to business and life combined. We need to begin those magical conversations now to ensure that we don’t just do more of the old male ways. The new way is ‘and and’ male and female, masculine and feminine, the balance that we see in nature brought into our fiscal and social existence.

Self indulgence

So maybe this is time for the world to be self-indulgent as I was taking a sunshine holiday, to congratulate ourselves on the awareness now growing strongly that women matter. I believe this is a world issue not a woman issue. Women do not want to do this on their own, even though they could. Because women value life they know it is together that the world works best.

Be self indulgent in your own life and see the pace at which your ‘body’ works. This does not mean the same thing to each person; gender, age, disability and natural health conditions make a difference. Our natural pace is not the same …and when it comes to men and women, the pace is different by nature and inclination!

The last 60 years

Women facing the male world of business over the last 60 years have recognized limitations when motherhood and caring have been a choice; either chosen by them; created accidentally; or brutally forced on them. The male world of work does not yet truly provide for this vital nurturing role as part of the economic planning process. We are beset by rules and regulations, grievance and harassment cases, that strangle business. Women see life as part of everything and so as they set up business they make choices that work for them. I see the great strength of combining male and female natures into a new way of business.

So what?

What if – business was not first and foremost about making money – but about providing a relevant income for all that sustained the whole. This is much of the substance of social enterprise which many women favour as a model of business. If money was not our core driver but purely another output then our success criteria might shift too. There are many ways of creating a new business model and we don’t yet have it right – however at least if we get round the table and converse to find common ground so magic can happen.

Magical Conversations

In searching for the new ways, we can also draw on our experiences and those of others, wise men and women. We don’t need to abandon the old, even if we explore forward rather than past. We can also draw on nature and learn to be self indulgent, take time out to look at ourselves in new ways. Not to be someone we aren’t but actually to discover we have everything we need to know right here, right now – in our bodies, our hearts, our minds and our souls!

Take time out to think from your heart today!

Expansion and contraction – the natural ebb and flow of life and business?

Expansion and contraction – the natural ebb and flow of life and business or are we forcing the issue?

Summer breathing as June passes the Summer Solstice, and here in the UK, we enjoy the wonderful heat and the expansive noise of England winning through in the World Cup, during a time of daily contraction of our financial power in a budget geared to collective restraint, I wondered about the power of our own natural reserves?

Swirling despair or growing pains?

Everyone I know is experiencing swirls of despair and exhilaration, no day is the predictable day we expected. The past is past. The future is ours to grow. And one person’s point of view can be positive or negative over the same situation depending on their nature, their life experience and their current status. Naturally we all perceive the world differently, we are all different, yet we are also the same; living breathing human beings. When we are facing tough challenges (as the world is right now) we polarize to our core point of view and find obstacles and limitations around us.

Why do some of us face each day with energy and vivacious capacity to smile regularly even when the chips are down? And others become despondent and cynical about possibilities and strains that don’t fit now, don’t adhere to our expectations born of past promises! We have a world that needs re-order at a fundamental level, expanding collaboration and contracting chaos. We have choices, many on a daily basis about survival, growth and the future for our children – and our children’s children. We are all connected and inter-connected. What we do right now affects everyone eventually in the whole world and for generations alive when we are gone. We are all connected – yet do we believe that really? Everyone is some mother’s child; we all are born of human stock.

Choices – yours or mine? Do we believe and own our own choices that connect into the collective responsibility – especially in our own families or communities or workplaces when there are so many disagreements, negative behaviour and possible abuse? Can we be open-minded in conversation and listen to everyone, holding their perspective with our own? This is especially relevant to bringing new conversations together between men and women, within women’s group and within men’s groups. Gender confusion still lies at the heart of broken relationships and abuse.

Do men and women face these current difficult times differently?

I believe we do – yet one gender is not better or more right than the other.We need an ‘and/and’ mind shift to create a world together not an ‘either/or’ world of separate parts. Men and women are both responsible and both need to be engaged in the foundations and a new start. There are many different approaches that build society and economic reform together – these approaches economically, politically, socially and spiritually differ in core roots of maleness and femaleness, the yin and yang of life and energy. The former male energy builds strong direction, provider drivers and tenacity of mindful, clever ‘brainy’ ideas – while the latter female fuel, underpins the life force of relationships and community coherence, brings emotional and mental intelligence in a pre-packed integrated package. Although some women are tougher, more masculine than others, some are gentler more cautious, less confident, all women want their lives to honour life and common sense prevail. Women have enormous untapped talents to bring a balance future to our world.

Together men and women are more powerful. Separately we fight for airspace, not listening to the other’s need.

We rival each other for position on a past plan headed for bankruptcy and social disorder – when we now have a choice to co-create a new future. Here is an example of a new way of thinking and being.

A new style together

I had the great pleasure to join a wonderful community in Geneva last weekend for ‘Friends of Humanity’, a foundation set up by Graziella Zanoletti CIO (Chief Inspiration Officer) of Elite Rentals. Graziella’s great success in the commercial world is now partnered by her great passion to give back to many good causes in less developed countries such as India, earthquake suffering in Nepal, South American rainforests and children in Tibet. 100 people gathered to hear the news on these projects and to come together, men, women, and their families adding back many £1000s by being part of this intention.

I met many extraordinary people especially my host Fabienne Feldman, helped to run this amazing event. We watched and joined in with likeminded people to gather together, hold magical conversations, listen to wonderful music and song, chatter about life and purpose and those projects on display; we eat fabulously well yet abundance for all and enjoyed the wonder of the day – it was an example of people coming together who didn’t know each other and who now form bonds across the world… from Boston to Goa, from London to LA… proving that communities can so easily come together in harmony for a common purpose across the world.

I explored with Graziella the nature of a new approach to “business, life and giving back” when we met last month for our first Magical Conversation at Fabienne’s home. Integrating commercial success, building personal and collective wealth, giving back, creating social cohesion and sustainable communities – bringing social enterprise into main stream business ethics – these are core to our conversations and those of many other female conversations I experience…and with many wise men too who feel tuned into this new multi-streamed way of being, business and life. How do we each measure up to these intentions in our own life?

Magical Conversations are about ‘life’ and business and society – about truth and trust, respect and relationships, humanity and prosperity – and becoming more keenly aware of what matters to others as well as our own. Everywhere I go, wise men and women are speaking with their hearts as much as their heads…and allowing their inner spirit to guide them more times than not. The nature of magical conversations is to embrace expansion and contraction in all we do and not get out of balance in our own lives and in our world. It is being aware of where and how one needs to expand effort and operate at a level of financial viability – consistently contracting efforts where obstacles appear, adhering to rules and regulations, “and and” being our mantra in expanding in relationships, respect and trust in our lives and in our businesses. It’s about exploring a common reason for giving back, feeding and educating those in the world less well off, both in developing countries – and more importantly, lovingly, at home in our own communities.

“It’s not so much about what you do, it’s about the loving you put into the doing that counts” Anon

How can we mend the world when we are not mended (healed from the inside out) first? This all starts at home with love… with loving yourself, your closest friends and family and community first.

Like breathing in and breathing out, expansion and contraction underpins our life force. Masculine and feminine energies do similarly ebb and flow; male dominance is necessary for strength and getting tasks done while the feminine energy flows, nurtures and heals the cracks so that communities can gain sustainable results. Together this alliance of men and women brings abundance in the true gifts of our natural life to be self sustaining for all members. Get to know your own natural gender nature and recognize different perspectives are valid too. It’s the ‘common purpose’ of conversations, built on trust, that includes all points of view, which will help our future come sooner.

Our ‘BIG SOCIETY’

We have a long way to go in the UK, our political leaders talk of a ‘big society’; many male CEOs talk of attracting women into the top positions, mixed boardrooms leading better; many communities, public and private make noises about community cohesion. I applaud their words, the rhetoric, the opinions…. however I don’t believe we invite all the right people to the conversations and listen well enough?

I don’t yet see enough evidence that the best, most aware, intelligent, experienced women are invited to really, truly, openly explore ‘what women want’. Maybe they don’t get noticed or don’t speak up enough. We’re in a world that doesn’t allow women to be women, to grow naturally, be business women and mothers, to grant that life’s natural family pressures are accounted for without marginalization financially or limitations in job prospects.

If we keep going round the same old arguments and propositions, guess what we get the old emerging again. We need to explore more, the new awaits us on the horizon of our awakening to possibilities without judgment and favour.

Magical Conversations count

We can’t create a ‘big society’ based on the old blueprint of business and life separation (the male plan that has traditionally separated ‘making money’ and ‘life’ into two camps)– there are more core principles of evolution to be explored (a female plan for business would combines ‘making money’ and dealing with ‘life’ issues).

My invitation to YOU I now implore my sisters, women of all types, generations, creeds and cultures to put aside the past and grow strong views on ‘what women (and men) really want’ and join our brothers, all kinds – tough guys and gentle giants – in the conversation of co-creation – and magical conversations.