We have a dream….

Martin Luther King’s famous words “I have a dream…” came to mind yesterday at the Women on Fire conference, when a few hundred women and a handful of mindful men gathered in the majestic beauty of Central Hall, Westminster.

Eleanor Roosevelt said “the future belongs to those who believe in the power of their dreams”

I do so believe in the power of my dreams and yesterday this was multipied100 fold with a whole audience of amazing women. Let me tell you more.

I experienced the fire of women come alive through this wonderful day; I heard their stories, trials and tribulations, victories and wisdom shared in an amazing uplifting energy to bring their dreams alive. The collective dream of those women gathered shines a new ray of hope and possibility, of aligning with Mother Earth with our female wisdom to seed new generations of healthy children, to support the underdog, to create new rules through current systems yet with a female vision of creative collaboration and great integrity; we seek the justice and care for all, as all deserve so because they are human beings; to defuse the power politics of the minority who hold all the wealth and power and deal with rough justice and not fairness; to spread kindness across all peoples, all communities, all nations.

Our dream is that women are heard, clearly, loudly, with due care and attention, and that we voice our truths in ways that men will hear and all women will grace with honor and pride. Our dream is that collectively and singularly we reach our pure and natural potential to bring harmony and goodwill into everyday existence, to be practical in our co-parenting and joint decision makers in world affairs, in corporate life, in our workplaces, homes and playgrounds. Women coming together, bringing fire from the source of Mother Earth into our bodies, hearts and minds, into our spirit, into our dreams “we too have a dream…” and we will be heard now!

In all of this, “I pledge my dream to help co-create a world where men and women truly understand each other, recognize and respect our natural contributions to life and business and society, and value our different attributes; a world where we truly have a partnership style not born of the past but of the future potential to truly be equal in the co-creation of our world; truly listening, observing, trusting and collaborating with each other on a new blueprint for life.

I have a dream that we can create life where there are no abusive relationships, no tortured families, no bullied schoolchildren or harassed employees; no wars, no crime and no damaging behaviour; a world where women are honoured and men are loving, where women value their natural female beauty and nurturing energy alongside their strength and courage; and men value their natural lead yet know their potential to embrace emotions – both dancing together in a natural alignment and flow.”

I commit to the happening of my dream – that all women’s voices will be heard and valued – that all will shine their natural value in honour of Mother Earth, to understand that we too take responsibility alongside men for the damaged world we live in our current daily existence; whether economically or socially challenged, whether in dangerous territory, or in civilized lands, women have not stood truly together to have one voice heard by men.

Sisters, we have no time to argue or condamn, to moan or complain; we must work fast to save our endangered world, our dimished family units, our rising crime rates and wars around the world killing our young men. Women have a vital role, a life giving nurturing role and together we can make the difference.

I declare my dream to bring collaborative between all parties, men and women, generations, communities, nations and religions; enabling all to come to the table, to the campfire, to the light; to engage in magical conversations. I declare my passion to educate young and old in the natural differences we bring to that conversation; to use my full skills and expertise to spread knowledge for all to learn; to teach people how to engaged in conversations that enhance their life and everyone elses; to help people transform their negative assumptions, release constraints and live a full and meaningfull life; to participate fully in the fire of love and compassion that can heal our world; and to seek through these conversations to achieve a new way to live together with respect and integrity.

How do I plan to do this ; with your engagement, your support, your contributions; through shared spaces, declared intentions, shared stories, shared knowledge; through bringing people’s great stories into public gaze, honestly and with truth and conviction; to do so through media, TV, internet, interviewing wise and courageous women and men who are stepping up to be the pioneers of our world transformation.

Many of these pioneers were at Women on Fire, both on stage and in the audience; this is the great beginning, Thank you Judith, thank you Lucia, without you and all your helpers this wouldn’t have happened, I am so blessed to know you and all there to be on this journey together, here’s to meeting again very soon and stoking up the fire!


A poem for today – Women on Fire

Women on Fire, Women inspire, together we are wise,
Our reality occurs to us daily; our hearts are soft, our will is strong,
Our true value is yet unknown even to our selves.
It’s time to recognize we are all one, mothers of a new world;
Here to love not fear, our kindness will kindle a future of hope.
We need a realization that we can forgive, the past is past,
Surely we are responsible for what happens next?
Let make sure it is inclusive embracing, collaborative, enriching,
Abandon now the competitiveness between sisters,
Instruct a new paradigm, a stand for integrity, a wholeness that brings joy,
Not born of yesterday, but seeded with our hearts and wombs.
A new blueprint for life and work, for families, for parenting, for abundance,
Breeding a society that serves all, dependants and workers alike,
Humanity for humanity, fair for all and love for everyone.

Written by Pauline Crawford 23.04.2011 for Women on Fire

Perfect timing

Have you had that day, that perfect day, when everything happens in perfect timings? You arise on time, feel fabulous, and you imagine your day ahead perfectly, even plan for the unexpected to be perfectly timed with a response you’ll sail through. This is not to control the day ahead but to allow its perfection to be timely because you set the pace. My beautiful cat Daisy, knows how to set the pace. She is 21 years old and is always in perfect timing with her day!

“Never be a slave to time but make it your servant. You have to make up your mind what you want to do and then go ahead and do it; and you will find that you have the time to do it perfectly“ says Elieen Caddy, from Opening Doors Within.

Try it – You set intentions for parking spaces, seats together on trains, conversations to be sparkling and tuned; you meet people you want to meet, even unexpected strangers flow into your day. Even the right thoughts and ideas arise at the perfect time. The sun shines on you even through cloudy skies as you flow through your day.

I can hear you naysayers muttering – “but I have days when perfect timing goes out the door, I am late, I am hassled, I don’t get my work done’ other people don’t do what they should, the world is against me…” And you develop the perfect conspiracy theory to confirm to yourself that it’s not your fault. You sleep fitfully but uncertainly happy that it wasn’t you!

Now take stock of your own perfect timing philosophy.

Since arriving in my new place this year, my place of unstuckness – I have placed an intention into my life that everything is designed to be perfect timing. What I mean by this is: my ‘perfect timing’ is an integral belief within ‘my game of life’ so even the nasty unexpected happening is ‘happening’ in perfect timing .i.e. is meant to be happening. Contrary thinking you may think! It works like this.

Everything in my life is perfectly designed to happen this way and indeed that has been true of ALL that has happened in my life to date (and will happen in the future).

My freedom to have perfect timing is as a result of my setting it as my intention and philosophy and as I take responsibility for my time and all the thoughts, feeling and actions in my life.

I accept that the perfect life is in each moment of being, that the value of being in that moment runs my clock of perfect timing.

And magically, it works, even when I am running late, I take responsibility, even if the tubes are running late, I own my relationship with that journey of time, and inform my being-ness that this moment is always perfect in its infinite capacity to be a choice I make to be.

In this state of knowing that each moment is perfectly designed for me to manage, cope with, deal with, feel into, react to; I give me permission to experience all emotions in real time, happiness, sadness, joy, frustration, love or fear, this is my life, my timing, my time… and it’s perfect, just the way it is.

In this state of perfect timing, today is the perfect time to write this!

Women on Fire

Last night I met more amazing women, as I do so now regularly as I spread the word about my work and my life transition. I am committed to bringing women together in their glorious sisterhood, helping them find their individual beauty and ensure their courage and ability to be their best in all they do, personally, professionally and as the goddesses we are born to be!

We were at a fabulous party held in Westminster to celebrate the 4th birthday of The Pink Shoe Club, founded by Helene Martin Gee, an outstanding leader and amazing loving woman. Many fabulous females were gathered (and a few men) to celebrate the night with laughter and warmth, blessing each other’s company.

Diana and Gayle, two new friends, greeted my stories with such glee and abundance (I hope you are reading this today) and my dearest friend, Maryon, all reminded me once more about the power of sisters that can help transform our world and our lives with men.

My thoughts went to the many fabulous women who have influenced my life over the years and especially today; my mother, my sister, my daughter and granddaughter; many others who I love and honour in my life; too many to name here. I am so fortunate to be blessed with wonderful girlfriends. They are important and are sisters to me and I open my heart to embrace them.

As often does when women chatter, our conversation last night turned at one point to women not getting on with other women and how sad that is to behold. A comment was made that women are so complex, they often would be badly behaved with other women and not bring out the sisterhood unilaterally. What happens when women don’t get on and why does this seem to wound us in our very essence?

Can we maintain ‘sisterhood’ consistency as women work together?

Often women who build businesses together have complimentary styles, one slightly more masculine, one slightly more feminine; this is our natural balance, the yin and yang of our gender, yet when we fall out, we bitch about it in a loud and nasty way that you don’t see men doing. We get emotionally fraught; it is our way to be cats! Many women report that it is much easier to work for a man as senior women cut them off from progress. When women strive to be engaged in politics, entrepreneurship and social re-order, they can often fall foul of shifting too far into alien behaviour (maybe because it’s a MALE enclave) and immediate women are labeled aggressively as ‘being like a man’! Whenever a woman behaves badly it goes against all of us: when men behave badly, other men ignore it.

I do believe that women can surmount this by drawing on all our natural talents and unique yet female styles, creating a new blueprint of inclusiveness with men but not having to go on working on the old map of work, the tough ‘dog eat dog’ world. We are a different species, beauty and diverse within our gender, but none the less all goddesses!

Thankfully I see a shift, a knowingness that we are sisters, I see evidence that more women want to bond together, to find a language in business and in life that manages all the wounds that have appear over the last centruies. It is time to bring our soul intentions together and bring kindness to rule the world not terror.

This Saturday Women on Fire is gathering women (and a few men) together at Central Hall Westminster to embrace, to chatter, to be grounded to our earth energy and to ignite the power of the fire within us; not to burn the world down with fear, but to light the light of love and shine a beacon to shine for all. Join us.

“Wisdom starts with wonder” Socrates

Ever thought about where your wisdom comes from? What has been imprinted into your very being before you are born from generations before you? This is not in the sense of past lives (that’s for another blog…) but simply the wisdom of inheritance from 2-3 generations past, merged through male and female lines, and the communities around them, into your essential being as you occur in your day.

Our wisdom is so influenced by the nature of your family history and adjusted by the times they lived in and merged with the times you now inhabit. Our wisdom comes from both maternal and paternal pathways of course and whether these are actively known to us during our childhood or not, whether we are orphaned, adopted, fostered or brought up by our natural parents, in wise or unwise whys, the unconscious guidelines are there. How can we bring these alive into conversations today where we share the wisdom over generations, like a wisdom waterfall, seeking our elders, to talk with our mid-life ages, and our youth to really listen to the evolution of current day wisdom.

I was fortunate to be born into a wise tradition of love and family values, and my childhood was one of love and togetherness. I look around today as people talk about the breakdown in ‘family’ living and community cohesion, and I wonder how and why we, collectively, have lost what people most cherish, a rich and fulfilling life; a sense of belonging, a pride in contribution for its own sake. The wisdom of the word ‘rich’ has been misplaced by the obsession for money and not as a word to describe a desirable natural life of joy and happiness, rich in all aspects of life, relationships, love, identity, achievement and wholesome success. It feels somehow we have got the whole word trapped in a sticky web of materalism. Where does our sticky state come from? Is it inevitable because of our history or can we unstick the web of the past to emerge like a butterfly. I know we can all do so, and use the wisdom from ancient times to present day.

My own wisdom was influenced by my history and the times I was born into. It has also evolved through the route I have taken, the attitude I have developed and the good daily practices of living that guide my journey. I have evolved with my own children’s development; influenced by my choice to be of single status after 30 years in a partnership with their father; now as a grandmother and an entrepreneur, my wisdom evolves further as I seek to engage in a new way of collaborative living suitable to this era of transformation. Collecting strands of wisdom from all ages, all diverse individuals and multi-potential groups across society is a passion of mine. We each have so much to bring the conversation and time is pressing us to observe, converse, and merge our wisdom for the common good.

Socrates says ‘Wisdom starts with wonder’…

…as in wonderment of all that is wonderful in our world. It seems we only get bombarded with disaster, war, famine, mistreatment, injustice and pain. The world is writhing in agony in so many parts of the globe, near and far, yet I see also the clinks of light where human beings step into their wisdom.

Samuel Smiles said “We learn wisdom from failure much more than success. We often discover what will do by finding out what will not do: and probably those who never made a mistake never made a discovery.”

Some simple wisdom strategies:

• Put aside the constraints of your past for the possibility of a wise future (and if you don’t know what constrains you, then take a personal review journey with me)
• Do not fear your mistakes , know these provide ground to seed new discoveries (I have learned so much form my mistakes, I love ’em!)
• Allowing all (wise) views to come into your conversations, listen with your whole being not your pre conceptions and moral high ground (open your mind and heart to views outside your reasoning)
• Leave judgments and opinions outside the circle of conversation, hear wisdom from all corners of the world, draw the full square of life into a flow of inspiration (when the flow is stuck in an eddy, notice and then get paddling)
• Encourage good intentions and heartfelt expectations to raise everyone’s game, lead as you would leaded with unconditional love (life is about expansion or contraction, observe what is occurring for YOU not outside of you)
• Focus on sharing always in a consistent wise manner, join and leave every conversation inspired to inspire others (be present to the moment, this is NOW and the only space we have, take time to ‘wonder’ about all that is)

In my experience, wisdom is often mistaken for expertise or being clever – NO – wisdom does not happen because we think we know the answer, only when we don’t know what we don’t know, and we’re OK about not knowing, then we open up a space for wisdom to transform our lives… and magic conversations occur!

Join me for Magical Conversations in Richmond, starting from mid-May; dates and venue to be announced, register your interest by emailing me at pauline@magicalconversations.co.uk

Be curious about life

A curious adventure

In January 2006, I set off on a curious adventure and a turning point in my life.

I walked up Mt Kenya to reach 4200metres. Why curious? I am sure for walkers, mountains climbers and the like, this seems a good effort but maybe not a big deal but for me it was. It was my curiosity that pushed me to book a flight to Nairobi into the unknown.

I had never been a great walker, indeed not much of an outdoor type unless at sea, where I loved sailing. I didn’t know anyone I was travelling with and had made the decision to go only three weeks before leaving with my borrowed rucksack and inadequate golfing boots for over 2 weeks in Kenya.

There was something else happening than the usual ‘holiday’ desire, there was a curiosity to explore, to know what a totally new experience would teach me and to do something I had never done before.

My curious desire to expand what I knew about ‘me’ was certainly achieved although, as ever, not quite like I’d imagined and not necessarily in a predictable fashion. My first learning was that changing every parameter i.e. unknown place, people and context (mountain/tents/latrines/altitude) challenged my usual good sense of confidence; I was alone in a crowd on a dangerous track, and I became shy! Eeekkkk!

I needed to acclimatize.

I had never realized until then the true meaning of that word. I found myself timid, reserved and it was like being back as a child of 11 going up to my upper school without my best friend because we had fallen out. Then I had developed coping skills of communication, rapport and relating so that I could become the ‘connector’ of the class and so gain respect from all. I found myself doing the same with my climbing companions. Facing a challenging task with a range of experience, a diverse set of people and intimate living in communal tents with strangers was a good way to test your people skills!!

It reminds me now of how we can get over confident with our known experiences and forget to check-in on how others are feeling in the same situation which may be new for them.

How often do we not notice what others are feeling?

I sought courage!

The second challenge was the actual ‘doing’ the trek, it was tough. Apart from rushing up and down my 47 steps to the front door of my flat, I had really had no exercise as such. The mountain was long, slow, and steep – for me. We took it slow, a trip that can be done in 2 days easily by fit walkers, was taken over 5 days. I learned about endurance, courage, and pace. I learned also about ‘being’ at your pace not being worried about competing, the mountain was asking me to listen to my own rhythm.

Slowly, slowly, I learned to walk at a snail’s pace; breathe, and look up and notice the world around me rather than being stuck in my own fear of “can I do this?”

How often do we do this in our daily over pressure life?

I found insight and wisdom…

At the top of my trek, I stopped and rested at 4200m I saw the world in a new light. The mountain peaks, the valleys, the overhangs, the boulders, the pathway strewn with tiny sharp stones, the community we formed, the support network as we walked and talked and ate together, all formed a world in itself. Each experience, each adventure, each curiosity, was a micro view of my world and the whole world.

We come together, some unknown to each other, some friends, some family, all with different ages, genders, nationalities – and we all experienced the experience differently. I learned not to take things for granted, to get out of my own comfort zone, and to be in tune with the ground beneath my feet and the sky above me and all the beauty of life in between!!

My wise advice – Go be curious, be adventurous, delve into the unknown and know always it enhances your life if you’re willing! If I had not, I would never have seen this view….

Learning new stuff everyday


Day 15 of the 30 day Blog Challenge and I have learned so much.

I have managed to write every day – even though several times near midnight, even dealt with the whole thing on my blackberry writing the text in memo pad and copy pasting into Word Press on the blackberry screen!

I even received a text accolade from my son when I managed to take the ‘short link’ and post on twitter AND facebook. His shock and pleasure at my grasp of technology and social media was great to receive! It made me laugh out loud that when I suggested I wanted to know how to post photos too on my blackberry/ facebook that I received a prompt “not so fast, don’t get too big for your boots!”

Could it be that I might get too good for him! Challenging his generation’s way of connecting. I guess maybe I am getting into a style not desirable for a grandma?

This is a new age – for us all – and those who desire to be anything they want to be, can be.

At this half way mark I have discovered:

• We can learn everything we want, when we want, at any age we want – if we want!
• The most daunting task is not so once mastered; it appears to get simpler as we practice.
• The habit of anything takes practice – writing is available to anyone. Desire is the key ingredient.
• Its fun, it’s friendly, it’s rewarding, its mind stretching, its growth…
• The whole series could be chapters of a book.
• To be “retweeted” is extraordinarily wonderful complimentary and gives one a feel good factor!
• To be “retweeted” by complete strangers is even better!!
• The more I continue, the more I learn, the more I grow, the more I feel I am a writer after all.

The last point is poignant as at school I hated spelling classes, not least because I couldn’t spell. I have always felt I am a wee bit dyslexic if that is possible. Anyway, I soon decided that as I couldn’t spell, I wouldn’t read much, or write much that was to be examined. I was really good at Maths and numbers gave me no problem, so I steered away from the WORDS bit!

So I left school with the minimum O level English, in the written language experience, and vowed never to write a book – or indeed read too many. Curiously I wrote a detailed diary instead and of course made hundreds of mistakes where never read as no one got near that book. As I review my life, I realize how that decision that I was no good with words nearly thwarted my author potential!

My book is coming !

Always know desire and learning create magic, and watch this space for my book called ‘Who’s in Charge’ a story book about men and women and now we struggle to recognize there’s more than one type of each. Six characters, 3 men and 3 women, come together to solve a problem and save the world from disaster. Their journey charts a dynamic course from chaos to clearing, from battles to buddies, from distrusting each other to dancing together as they forge a new way to be who they need to be.

Do they transform and save our world? Watch, wait and wonder!